








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 667 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 125 matches | ||
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 29 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3468 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,097 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4556 | 35% |
| Smokes | 3300 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2707 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2534 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $617,681 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 280 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sem Pescoço | 58% | 78 |
| #2 | SandrO ツ | 55% | 89 |
| #3 | Fuzzy | 48% | 120 |
| #4 | Carretas | 40% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sem Pescoço | 58% | 78 |
| #2 | SandrO ツ | 55% | 89 |
| #3 | Fuzzy | 48% | 120 |
| #4 | Carretas | 40% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Carretas | 11 | 0.0089 |
| #2 | Fuzzy | 5 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | Sem Pescoço | 4 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | SandrO ツ | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SandrO ツ | 299 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #2 | Carretas | 279 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #3 | Fuzzy | 183 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #4 | Sem Pescoço | 177 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | +3.14 | 77 | 68 |
| #2 | Sem Pescoço | +2.44 | 73 | 51 |
| #3 | SandrO ツ | -0.04 | 64 | 65 |
| #4 | Fuzzy | -1.36 | 48 | 53 |
| #5 | Carretas | -3.01 | 44 | 66 |





