








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 203 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 169 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1638 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3843 | 33% |
| Smokes | 3014 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2467 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2377 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $391,322 of utility $79 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 250 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sem Pescoço | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | SandrO ツ | 55% | 22 |
| #3 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | 40% | 58 |
| #4 | Fuzzy | 40% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sem Pescoço | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | SandrO ツ | 55% | 22 |
| #3 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | 40% | 58 |
| #4 | Fuzzy | 40% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | 23 | 0.0187 |
| #2 | Fuzzy | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Sem Pescoço | 1 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | 311 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #2 | SandrO ツ | 81 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #3 | Fuzzy | 60 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Sem Pescoço | 33 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | +4.05 | 75 | 69 |
| #2 | Sem Pescoço | +3.64 | 59 | 51 |
| #3 | SandrO ツ | +0.70 | 68 | 63 |
| #4 | Fuzzy | -0.72 | 55 | 49 |
| #5 | Carretas | -1.21 | 52 | 72 |





