








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 45 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1279 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 709 | 31% |
| Smokes | 623 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 403 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 520 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $328,169 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | 58% | 78 |
| #2 | SandrO ツ | 58% | 33 |
| #3 | Carretas | 57% | 14 |
| #4 | Fuzzy | 43% | 28 |
| #5 | Sherby | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | 10 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Carretas | 2 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | Sherby | 1 | 0.0083 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sem Pescoço | +2.42 | 74 | 49 |
| #2 | เм ЯβҜje💖 | +1.71 | 71 | 70 |
| #3 | SandrO ツ | -0.10 | 65 | 66 |
| #4 | Sherby | -1.46 | 71 | 38 |
| #5 | Fuzzy | -2.67 | 51 | 44 |





