










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 50 matches | ||
| Premier | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1182 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,596 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 569 | 36% |
| Smokes | 318 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 570 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 139 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $196,048 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 43 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | tokumms | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | neo fart | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | WelpM3 | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ | 67% | 12 |
| #2 | tokumms | 64% | 11 |
| #3 | neo fart | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | WelpM3 | 50% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neo fart | 9 | 0.0233 |
| #2 | tokumms | 5 | 0.0246 |
| #3 | WelpM3 | 4 | 0.0265 |
| #4 | ツ | 3 | 0.0131 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neo fart | 65 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #2 | tokumms | 23 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #3 | WelpM3 | 12 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | ツ | 3 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | neo fart | +2.86 | 53 | 48 |
| #2 | u | -0.69 | 60 | 33 |
| #3 | ツ | -0.84 | 56 | 18 |
| #4 | tokumms | -0.87 | 6 | 19 |
| #5 | WelpM3 | -3.95 | 16 | 41 |





