








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 203 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
798 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,355 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 733 | 31% |
| Smokes | 692 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 344 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 586 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $252,368 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #15 | Yamiichi 侍 | 60% | 10 |
| #16 | qwe | 59% | 22 |
| #17 | wh1te | 50% | 6 |
| #18 | Kotleks | 47% | 19 |
| #19 | Ki3lo | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucyia | 4 | 0.0074 |
| #2 | Kolieks | 4 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | Mhajkel | 4 | 0.0471 |
| #4 | Kotleks | 3 | 0.0077 |
| #5 | Piku | 2 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pr3lo | 67 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | Kotleks | 66 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | qwe | 62 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | Kolieks | 62 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| #5 | Piku | 60 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zireael | +3.87 | 75 | 65 |
| #2 | mrouz | +3.34 | 82 | 56 |
| #3 | Yamiichi 侍 | +2.88 | 93 | 63 |
| #4 | Piku | +2.81 | 75 | 67 |
| #5 | Kolieks | +2.25 | 66 | 60 |





