








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3204 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,852 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2052 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2007 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1225 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1568 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,141,372 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 268 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zireael | 73% | 15 |
| #2 | LilOak | 58% | 96 |
| #3 | PROJECT MBAPPE | 58% | 62 |
| #4 | Piku | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | HromaK | 57% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Piku | 58% | 45 |
| #5 | HromaK | 57% | 37 |
| #6 | Mhajkel | 54% | 116 |
| #7 | Masterio | 53% | 130 |
| #8 | kubusss | 53% | 150 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LilOak | 23 | 0.0121 |
| #2 | Mhajkel | 20 | 0.0084 |
| #3 | kubusss | 17 | 0.0055 |
| #4 | Masterio | 5 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | HromaK | 5 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kubusss | 289 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | PROJECT MBAPPE | 122 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | Mhajkel | 97 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #4 | LilOak | 96 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Piku | 76 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zireael | +5.93 | 67 | 61 |
| #2 | Piku | +4.98 | 83 | 57 |
| #3 | Kolieks | +3.17 | 69 | 53 |
| #4 | HromaK | -0.42 | 58 | 49 |
| #5 | kubusss | -0.65 | 56 | 60 |





