








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 749 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 162 matches | ||
| Faceit | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3809 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,648 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1654 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1963 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 692 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 1339 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,089,449 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 468 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hog | 63% | 24 |
| #2 | AsiliC | 59% | 27 |
| #3 | ✪ Supzy ❤ | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | Rossyツ | 50% | 42 |
| #5 | Hæælas guttpå | 46% | 200 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Rossyツ | 50% | 42 |
| #5 | Hæælas guttpå | 46% | 200 |
| #6 | Zek1 | 42% | 86 |
| #7 | Kneegear | 34% | 79 |
| #8 | Lazy ツ | 12% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hæælas guttpå | 15 | 0.0036 |
| #2 | Kneegear | 11 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | Zek1 | 8 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | ✪ Supzy ❤ | 8 | 0.0203 |
| #5 | Rossyツ | 7 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zek1 | 450 | 0.25 | 8 min |
| #2 | Kneegear | 215 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | Rossyツ | 209 | 0.22 | 5 min |
| #4 | Hæælas guttpå | 125 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | AsiliC | 123 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hog | +4.46 | 92 | 43 |
| #2 | Rossyツ | +3.32 | 87 | 62 |
| #3 | ✪ Supzy ❤ | +1.33 | 68 | 67 |
| #4 | AsiliC | +0.26 | 74 | 68 |
| #5 | SER1OUS | +0.25 | 77 | 38 |





