








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 338 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 502 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 73 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3625 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,954 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2769 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2586 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 7564 | 45% |
| Molotovs | 4035 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,319,264 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1132 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ananász 🍍🍍 | 58% | 31 |
| #2 | [H]ardCore | 52% | 83 |
| #3 | Par Kin Son | 45% | 267 |
| #4 | Para lazım, çok para lazım | 43% | 37 |
| #5 | Aloha Akhbar | 42% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Aloha Akhbar | 42% | 55 |
| #6 | HeSSaN | 42% | 120 |
| #7 | Mr.Gatto | 41% | 125 |
| #8 | dzsízuszkrisz | 40% | 43 |
| #9 | Massive Rat | 36% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Par Kin Son | 15 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | [H]ardCore | 15 | 0.0088 |
| #3 | Para lazım, çok para lazım | 8 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | Aloha Akhbar | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | dzsízuszkrisz | 3 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [H]ardCore | 319 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #2 | Par Kin Son | 233 | 0.04 | 7 min |
| #3 | Mr.Gatto | 164 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | Massive Rat | 152 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| #5 | HeSSaN | 144 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [H]ardCore | +3.67 | 86 | 57 |
| #2 | Ananász 🍍🍍 | +3.53 | 66 | 69 |
| #3 | HeSSaN | +2.58 | 64 | 55 |
| #4 | dzsízuszkrisz | +2.03 | 89 | 55 |
| #5 | Par Kin Son | +1.76 | 77 | 55 |





