








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 705 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 774 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5759 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 40,502 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13048 | 32% |
| Smokes | 13119 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 9988 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 4347 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,293,353 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1613 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | XmOo IzZ NoOBiE | 52% | 64 |
| #2 | bmw speed | 49% | 134 |
| #3 | Stampertje | 48% | 273 |
| #4 | BaWsiN | 48% | 129 |
| #5 | CaTsCaNn^ | 48% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Predeton | 44% | 43 |
| #11 | DEANMACHINE | 44% | 143 |
| #12 | Harry Nutts | 43% | 104 |
| #13 | CaTsCaN^ | 42% | 202 |
| #14 | SoloArTist,, ツ | 39% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DEANMACHINE | +3.27 | 88 | 69 |
| #2 | Stampertje | +1.68 | 48 | 64 |
| #3 | n!v4 | +1.20 | 53 | 62 |
| #4 | miQ | +0.39 | 61 | 69 |
| #5 | bmw speed | +0.35 | 75 | 58 |





