








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1491 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 570 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 290 matches | ||
| Wingman | 76 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




84 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
11160 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,326 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12239 | 38% |
| Smokes | 10565 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 2427 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 7095 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,780,287 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 921 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | р⭕⃤ₓ | 10 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | KJ | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | ✪ Georg Nüßlein ☁☂ | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Rambo1000 | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | ๖ۜCoۜbra ♞ ☆ ☃ | 6 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MissKarma | 483 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #2 | tokaR | 338 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #3 | Trabireiter | 284 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | KJ | 256 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #5 | Linath ( °□°) ︵ is a Ninja. | 214 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | problem | +2.15 | 58 | 64 |
| #2 | SaltyMalty | +2.07 | 75 | 59 |
| #3 | tokaR | +0.87 | 46 | 63 |
| #4 | ⓂⒺⓂⒺⓈ ☈ ❤ | +0.44 | 52 | 65 |
| #5 | р⭕⃤ₓ | +0.39 | 48 | 65 |





