








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 695 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4724 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,601 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2448 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4026 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 1788 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 2339 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,152,521 of utility $143 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1319 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | abe! | 72% | 46 |
| #2 | Daddy Xi Ping | 71% | 21 |
| #3 | Caboose | 67% | 30 |
| #4 | clr | 59% | 98 |
| #5 | Feare | 55% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | clr | 59% | 98 |
| #5 | Feare | 55% | 38 |
| #6 | Nug | 55% | 29 |
| #7 | 98 in 4 | 47% | 38 |
| #8 | Zec | 45% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clr | 6 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | 98 in 4 | 5 | 0.0075 |
| #3 | Zec | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | abe! | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Feare | 2 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clr | 419 | 0.24 | 9 min |
| #2 | Zec | 229 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #3 | Feare | 139 | 0.18 | 3 min |
| #4 | Daddy Xi Ping | 48 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #5 | Caboose | 45 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | songbird fan | +3.81 | 87 | 50 |
| #2 | Daddy Xi Ping | +1.47 | 56 | 61 |
| #3 | Caboose | +1.45 | 83 | 48 |
| #4 | clr | +0.92 | 83 | 69 |
| #5 | Nug | +0.73 | 52 | 33 |





