








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 367 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1342 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,973 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2580 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1975 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1012 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1406 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $604,817 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 全国一ノ歯茎王 | 4 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | ALTO | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #3 | remiii- | 3 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | hiiragi | 1 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | アナミマス | 1 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ALTO | 416 | 0.28 | 11 min |
| #2 | 全国一ノ歯茎王 | 236 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | hiiragi | 102 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #4 | remiii- | 89 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | アナミマス | 53 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ALTO | +1.24 | 61 | 70 |
| #2 | remiii- | +0.90 | 83 | 59 |
| #3 | Тонакайи✪ | +0.13 | 56 | 57 |
| #4 | アナミマス | -1.02 | 82 | 62 |
| #5 | 全国一ノ歯茎王 | -1.95 | 55 | 46 |





