








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 986 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 143 matches | ||
| Premier | 108 matches | ||
| Wingman | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3968 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,740 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1979 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2513 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2438 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1810 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,394,473 of utility $176 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 279 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viggedutten | 49% | 68 |
| #2 | ฿JØ̈Ɽ₦฿ɆⱤ₲ツ | 46% | 24 |
| #3 | Owtto | 43% | 42 |
| #4 | Alva | 43% | 40 |
| #5 | claw | 39% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ฿JØ̈Ɽ₦฿ɆⱤ₲ツ | 46% | 24 |
| #3 | Owtto | 43% | 42 |
| #4 | Alva | 43% | 40 |
| #5 | claw | 39% | 23 |
| #6 | limpan | 38% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Owtto | 12 | 0.0126 |
| #2 | limpan | 8 | 0.0080 |
| #3 | Viggedutten | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | claw | 3 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Alva | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Viggedutten | 144 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #2 | Owtto | 134 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #3 | Alva | 127 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | limpan | 111 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | claw | 71 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Owtto | +2.58 | 80 | 65 |
| #2 | Zaizter | +2.11 | 65 | 43 |
| #3 | claw | +1.36 | 78 | 63 |
| #4 | Viggedutten | +0.41 | 65 | 53 |
| #5 | ฿JØ̈Ɽ₦฿ɆⱤ₲ツ | -1.32 | 77 | 32 |





