








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 232 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2021 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,697 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1502 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1582 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1261 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1352 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $594,621 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 465 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Justus | 60% | 15 |
| #2 | Benizakura | 56% | 100 |
| #3 | ま Zugas | 56% | 136 |
| #4 | kesli | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | osQ | 45% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | kesli | 53% | 17 |
| #5 | osQ | 45% | 11 |
| #6 | Paskaläjä männyn takana™ | 45% | 20 |
| #7 | Bare | 45% | 47 |
| #8 | (Kulju) | 27% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benizakura | 47 | 0.0228 |
| #2 | ま Zugas | 28 | 0.0103 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Benizakura | 428 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | ま Zugas | 312 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | Paskaläjä männyn takana™ | 66 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | osQ | 55 | 0.26 | 2 min |
| #5 | (Kulju) | 46 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Justus | +4.04 | 89 | 61 |
| #2 | Benizakura | +3.27 | 84 | 61 |
| #3 | ま Zugas | +1.56 | 75 | 57 |
| #4 | Bare | -0.33 | 67 | 54 |
| #5 | ♿ | -0.90 | 56 | 54 |





