








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 211 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1183 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,227 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 658 | 30% |
| Smokes | 506 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 575 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 488 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $325,045 of utility $125 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 784 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Disposable | 56% | 16 |
| #2 | Gribbley <3 | 46% | 79 |
| #3 | Listorz | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | Fadead | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | Eine, die leidet. | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Gribbley <3 | 46% | 79 |
| #3 | Listorz | 45% | 11 |
| #4 | Fadead | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | Eine, die leidet. | 38% | 8 |
| #6 | Noobs Inc. | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fadead | 16 | 0.0153 |
| #2 | Gribbley <3 | 5 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Disposable | 1 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Listorz | 1 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gribbley <3 | 74 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Fadead | 48 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | Noobs Inc. | 31 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Disposable | 22 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | Eine, die leidet. | 8 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nawcz | +0.98 | 74 | 52 |
| #2 | Fadead | +0.90 | 74 | 30 |
| #3 | Eine, die leidet. | -1.46 | 51 | 55 |
| #4 | Disposable | -1.57 | 53 | 47 |
| #5 | Noobs Inc. | -1.61 | 62 | 57 |





