








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
974 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 812 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 331 | 41% |
| Smokes | 126 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 187 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 168 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $36,274 of utility $17 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Listorz | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | Disposable | 55% | 22 |
| #3 | Gribbley <3 | 45% | 60 |
| #4 | nawcz | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | Eine, die leidet. | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Disposable | 55% | 22 |
| #3 | Gribbley <3 | 45% | 60 |
| #4 | nawcz | 44% | 50 |
| #5 | Eine, die leidet. | 40% | 10 |
| #6 | Noobs Inc. | 25% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nawcz | 7 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | Gribbley <3 | 4 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Disposable | 2 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nawcz | 78 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | Gribbley <3 | 48 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #3 | Disposable | 26 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #4 | Noobs Inc. | 23 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Eine, die leidet. | 12 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nawcz | +1.46 | 75 | 54 |
| #2 | Fadead | +1.35 | 75 | 31 |
| #3 | Listorz | +0.16 | 65 | 23 |
| #4 | Noobs Inc. | -0.24 | 67 | 42 |
| #5 | Disposable | -0.95 | 45 | 40 |





