








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 950 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 77 matches | ||
| Premier | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2199 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,809 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 707 | 19% |
| Smokes | 958 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1126 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1018 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,236,485 of utility $247 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 903 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AJ Stylcs | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | Phyl | 53% | 15 |
| #3 | Redsky | 50% | 110 |
| #4 | hajo_sesam | 48% | 23 |
| #5 | Faviid | 47% | 60 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shaeggi | 11 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | Redsky | 10 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Jesus | 9 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Faviid | 6 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | Tex | 3 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shaeggi | 357 | 0.22 | 10 min |
| #2 | Faviid | 271 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #3 | Jesus | 78 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #4 | Tex | 59 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | hajo_sesam | 57 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kur0 | +2.01 | 79 | 35 |
| #2 | Faviid | +1.24 | 65 | 62 |
| #3 | Phyl | +1.14 | 85 | 45 |
| #4 | AJ Stylcs | +0.34 | 78 | 53 |
| #5 | Shaeggi | +0.11 | 59 | 68 |





