








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1635 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 23 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2889 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,310 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1430 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1906 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1292 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 682 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,119,195 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4918 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | MIKU SKINS | 45% | 76 |
| #4 | grajpap | 45% | 94 |
| #5 | BooMczak | 43% | 100 |
| #6 | footjob | 39% | 71 |
| #7 | Kronixos | 39% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MIKU SKINS | 19 | 0.0119 |
| #2 | BooMczak | 14 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | grajpap | 12 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Kronixos | 11 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Hopaf | 5 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | grajpap | 291 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #2 | Hopaf | 219 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #3 | Kronixos | 165 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | MIKU SKINS | 109 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | BooMczak | 79 | 0.04 | 2 min |





