








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 116 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 231 matches | ||
| Faceit | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 40 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3140 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,303 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4184 | 24% |
| Smokes | 4635 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4650 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3834 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $717,803 of utility $97 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 416 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sanke | 58% | 57 |
| #2 | stenu | 53% | 77 |
| #3 | reid | 53% | 49 |
| #4 | anaz | 52% | 61 |
| #5 | tapsuG | 50% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matas | 23 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | tapsuG | 23 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | stenu | 11 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | aatos | 10 | 0.0076 |
| #5 | mr negative | 9 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matas | 1360 | 0.24 | 40 min |
| #2 | mr negative | 505 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #3 | tapsuG | 318 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | stenu | 266 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | anaz | 129 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matas | +3.14 | 72 | 83 |
| #2 | reid | +2.71 | 80 | 70 |
| #3 | stenu | +1.56 | 79 | 80 |
| #4 | saunakoira_kari | +1.20 | 68 | 55 |
| #5 | Sanke | +0.62 | 70 | 65 |





