








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 175 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Faceit | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3199 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,509 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2919 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3246 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3237 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2107 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,202,822 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 165 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | anaz | 57% | 61 |
| #2 | reid | 56% | 34 |
| #3 | saunakoira_kari | 50% | 40 |
| #4 | stenu | 50% | 90 |
| #5 | tapsuG | 50% | 177 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matas | 24 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | tapsuG | 24 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | ššš¦kš„š¢š©š¦ | 16 | 0.0044 |
| #4 | aatos | 15 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | stenu | 8 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matas | 1402 | 0.24 | 43 min |
| #2 | ššš¦kš„š¢š©š¦ | 450 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | tapsuG | 363 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #4 | stenu | 339 | 0.17 | 9 min |
| #5 | Sanke | 153 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Matas | +3.09 | 71 | 84 |
| #2 | reid | +2.67 | 79 | 61 |
| #3 | stenu | +2.01 | 75 | 81 |
| #4 | saunakoira_kari | +1.84 | 68 | 58 |
| #5 | Sanke | +0.43 | 70 | 66 |





