








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 48 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 326 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3337 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,349 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1007 | 12% |
| Smokes | 2843 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 2154 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 2345 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,041,707 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 322 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prossh | 56% | 45 |
| #2 | Daedalus | 52% | 88 |
| #3 | ye | 50% | 113 |
| #4 | Spicy | 49% | 80 |
| #5 | golden | 47% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Daedalus | 52% | 88 |
| #3 | ye | 50% | 113 |
| #4 | Spicy | 49% | 80 |
| #5 | golden | 47% | 66 |
| #6 | LeCrack | 45% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ye | 10 | 0.0041 |
| #2 | golden | 8 | 0.0056 |
| #3 | Daedalus | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | LeCrack | 2 | 0.0041 |
| #5 | Prossh | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ye | 336 | 0.14 | 9 min |
| #2 | golden | 93 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | Spicy | 89 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | Daedalus | 80 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | LeCrack | 54 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Spicy | +2.51 | 76 | 48 |
| #2 | ted was right | +1.70 | 65 | 45 |
| #3 | LeCrack | +0.76 | 75 | 56 |
| #4 | ye | +0.40 | 73 | 64 |
| #5 | golden | -0.09 | 55 | 49 |





