








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 739 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 351 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




65 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6245 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,497 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6670 | 31% |
| Smokes | 5732 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 4452 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 4643 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,475,564 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 436 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bananaboy | 32 | 0.0071 |
| #2 | TIP TOP | 27 | 0.0116 |
| #3 | mitinaax) | 25 | 0.0130 |
| #4 | HaZee | 17 | 0.0131 |
| #5 | big~ToTo | 14 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mitinaax) | 472 | 0.24 | 11 min |
| #2 | big~ToTo | 369 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | TIP TOP | 358 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #4 | Bananaboy | 235 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | Krisis | 166 | 0.10 | 4 min |





