








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 308 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Faceit | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2281 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,528 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2292 | 35% |
| Smokes | 2326 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 653 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1257 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $639,634 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 20Hz-20FPS-Daunis#1 | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | banaans_lv | 61% | 31 |
| #3 | HaZee | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | Huntey | 56% | 90 |
| #5 | Bananaboy | 51% | 122 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Huntey | 56% | 90 |
| #5 | Bananaboy | 51% | 122 |
| #6 | 𝓛𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝔂 | 50% | 22 |
| #7 | MartinEZ | 49% | 78 |
| #8 | big~ToTo | 38% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bananaboy | 14 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | Huntey | 9 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | banaans_lv | 9 | 0.0144 |
| #4 | MartinEZ | 7 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | HaZee | 4 | 0.0092 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MartinEZ | 278 | 0.17 | 7 min |
| #2 | Huntey | 159 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Bananaboy | 128 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | 20Hz-20FPS-Daunis#1 | 47 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | big~ToTo | 33 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HaZee | +2.77 | 75 | 49 |
| #2 | 𝓛𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝔂 | +1.03 | 64 | 58 |
| #3 | banaans_lv | +0.88 | 72 | 54 |
| #4 | Krisis | +0.53 | 56 | 59 |
| #5 | MartinEZ | +0.19 | 64 | 63 |





