








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 346 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 274 matches | ||
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2491 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,450 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2386 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2313 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 1690 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3061 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,737,448 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 512 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | 21 Cabbage | 45% | 131 |
| #3 | Cinny | 43% | 248 |
| #4 | GirthQuake | 41% | 190 |
| #5 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | 40% | 279 |
| #6 | iQuack | 39% | 133 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cinny | 40 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | 37 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | iQuack | 25 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | GirthQuake | 15 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | 21 Cabbage | 7 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cinny | 619 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #2 | GirthQuake | 490 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #3 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | 458 | 0.08 | 14 min |
| #4 | iQuack | 245 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #5 | 21 Cabbage | 209 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cinny | +3.69 | 63 | 69 |
| #2 | iQuack | +3.12 | 59 | 66 |
| #3 | 21 Cabbage | +0.66 | 66 | 54 |
| #4 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | +0.57 | 48 | 72 |
| #5 | GirthQuake | -1.65 | 26 | 61 |





