








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 662 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 321 matches | ||
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 41 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8155 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,512 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5539 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7222 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 3622 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 4129 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,390,198 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 611 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 21 Cabbage | 49% | 268 |
| #2 | GirthQuake | 44% | 234 |
| #3 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | 44% | 515 |
| #4 | iQuack | 44% | 232 |
| #5 | {TM}XxSRGPASTRIESxX | 43% | 248 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | 58 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | iQuack | 26 | 0.0054 |
| #3 | {TM}XxSRGPASTRIESxX | 19 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | 21 Cabbage | 17 | 0.0033 |
| #5 | GirthQuake | 14 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | 743 | 0.07 | 23 min |
| #2 | GirthQuake | 568 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #3 | iQuack | 421 | 0.09 | 9 min |
| #4 | 21 Cabbage | 386 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #5 | {TM}XxSRGPASTRIESxX | 297 | 0.06 | 9 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cinny | +2.77 | 63 | 67 |
| #2 | iQuack | +1.51 | 57 | 64 |
| #3 | 21 Cabbage | -0.02 | 64 | 51 |
| #4 | URGIRLSFAVORITEGAMER | -0.39 | 47 | 71 |
| #5 | GirthQuake | -1.67 | 27 | 61 |





