








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 32 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 136 matches | ||
| Wingman | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1757 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,560 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 462 | 18% |
| Smokes | 852 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 386 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 860 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $778,333 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 64 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vasion | 64% | 125 |
| #2 | aura | 59% | 88 |
| #3 | Lucky | 58% | 108 |
| #4 | axel | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | Blu | 54% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vasion | 64% | 125 |
| #2 | aura | 59% | 88 |
| #3 | Lucky | 58% | 108 |
| #4 | axel | 56% | 9 |
| #5 | Blu | 54% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vasion | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vasion | 487 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #2 | Lucky | 220 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Blu | 218 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #4 | aura | 97 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | axel | 25 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lucky | +3.64 | 91 | 49 |
| #2 | aura | -0.07 | 80 | 41 |
| #3 | axel | -0.16 | 68 | 61 |
| #4 | Vasion | -0.45 | 63 | 70 |
| #5 | bootlegm0NESY | -0.57 | 78 | 31 |





