










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
168 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 255 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 109 | 43% |
| Smokes | 39 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 82 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 25 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $52,977 of utility $166 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wardell Stephen Curry | 33% | 6 |
| #2 | meoracle | 33% | 6 |
| #3 | Jimmy Butler III | 0% | 3 |
| #4 | literallyjusthai | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wardell Stephen Curry | 33% | 6 |
| #2 | meoracle | 33% | 6 |
| #3 | Jimmy Butler III | 0% | 3 |
| #4 | literallyjusthai | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | meoracle | 2 | 0.0235 |
| #2 | Wardell Stephen Curry | 1 | 0.0085 |
| #3 | Jimmy Butler III | 1 | 0.0169 |
| #4 | literallyjusthai | 1 | 0.0169 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wardell Stephen Curry | 9 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #2 | Jimmy Butler III | 8 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| #3 | meoracle | 6 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | literallyjusthai | 1 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Buddy Hield | +0.90 | 73 | 36 |
| #2 | meoracle | -1.13 | 89 | 26 |
| #3 | Wardell Stephen Curry | -1.20 | 56 | 12 |
| #4 | Jimmy Butler III | -3.45 | 52 | 32 |
| #5 | literallyjusthai | -6.20 | 1 | 5 |





