








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
888 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,308 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 448 | 34% |
| Smokes | 49 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 232 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 579 | 44% |
Our logs show you have wasted $223,219 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mobile player | 45% | 58 |
| #2 | warcrimes in switzerland | 44% | 25 |
| #3 | scrooge mcduck | 43% | 23 |
| #4 | Curry god | 43% | 42 |
| #5 | Xenthial | 42% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mobile player | 158 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | Curry god | 96 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | warcrimes in switzerland | 89 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | scrooge mcduck | 85 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | ChimPanzer | 74 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scrooge mcduck | +3.13 | 70 | 48 |
| #2 | ExplosiveEnd | +1.73 | 62 | 39 |
| #3 | mobile player | +0.95 | 53 | 42 |
| #4 | warcrimes in switzerland | -0.35 | 63 | 51 |
| #5 | MONKE | -2.37 | 37 | 47 |





