








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 471 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 232 matches | ||
| Premier | 147 matches | ||
| Faceit | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 23 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4923 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3267 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2267 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 3109 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 2825 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,857,778 of utility $196 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 97 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mirBBe | 58% | 101 |
| #2 | kurqi | 54% | 100 |
| #3 | Juoppoo :3 | 54% | 52 |
| #4 | Little Fox | 51% | 152 |
| #5 | quido | 50% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Juoppoo :3 | 54% | 52 |
| #4 | Little Fox | 51% | 152 |
| #5 | quido | 50% | 110 |
| #6 | Lyijy Allan | 49% | 178 |
| #7 | zimo | 48% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kurqi | 9 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Lyijy Allan | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | Little Fox | 6 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | mirBBe | 6 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | Juoppoo :3 | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Little Fox | 457 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | kurqi | 455 | 0.22 | 13 min |
| #3 | Lyijy Allan | 266 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | quido | 252 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #5 | mirBBe | 182 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zimo | +4.46 | 81 | 63 |
| #2 | mirBBe | +1.32 | 63 | 54 |
| #3 | kurqi | +1.21 | 70 | 68 |
| #4 | vladis | +1.21 | 62 | 59 |
| #5 | quido | -0.11 | 62 | 66 |





