










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 153 matches | ||
| Wingman | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2812 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,287 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2294 | 25% |
| Smokes | 3500 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 2034 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1459 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $678,659 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 167 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joni Koivuniemi | 46% | 263 |
| #2 | Mc'C ツ | 46% | 24 |
| #3 | Jaakko kulta | 46% | 116 |
| #4 | Vasuri⭕⃤ | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | tigi | 41% | 263 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Jaakko kulta | 46% | 116 |
| #4 | Vasuri⭕⃤ | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | tigi | 41% | 263 |
| #6 | KILLERMASA 69 | 39% | 64 |
| #7 | Trap Joni | 32% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joni Koivuniemi | 41 | 0.0077 |
| #2 | tigi | 37 | 0.0077 |
| #3 | Jaakko kulta | 6 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | KILLERMASA 69 | 6 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | Vasuri⭕⃤ | 4 | 0.0072 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joni Koivuniemi | 875 | 0.16 | 20 min |
| #2 | Jaakko kulta | 577 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #3 | tigi | 200 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #4 | Mc'C ツ | 85 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | KILLERMASA 69 | 80 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Joni Koivuniemi | +3.28 | 75 | 56 |
| #2 | Mc'C ツ | +2.33 | 87 | 62 |
| #3 | Jaakko kulta | +0.73 | 51 | 61 |
| #4 | tigi | +0.71 | 71 | 33 |
| #5 | Vasuri⭕⃤ | +0.54 | 74 | 58 |





