








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1125 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,163 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1202 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1036 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1044 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 881 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $424,931 of utility $156 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 167 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cd4wg666 | 79% | 14 |
| #2 | 1TAP ♰ | 67% | 9 |
| #3 | Rocciel | 67% | 12 |
| #4 | kapyi | 65% | 23 |
| #5 | Grahvelli | 65% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NawTNeko | 12 | 0.0158 |
| #2 | KneeOffNeckPlz -Nigward- | 10 | 0.0400 |
| #3 | kapyi | 4 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | Grahvelli | 3 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | partypickle | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NawTNeko | 162 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | Grahvelli | 157 | 0.43 | 5 min |
| #3 | KneeOffNeckPlz -Nigward- | 81 | 0.32 | 3 min |
| #4 | kapyi | 67 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | | 49 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Grahvelli | +4.50 | 73 | 79 |
| #2 | KneeOffNeckPlz -Nigward- | +3.28 | 85 | 71 |
| #3 | NawTNeko | +3.23 | 75 | 72 |
| #4 | aux_13 | +1.75 | 80 | 64 |
| #5 | 1TAP ♰ | +1.41 | 59 | 56 |





