








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1452 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 367 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 216 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




57 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4079 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,685 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5970 | 38% |
| Smokes | 5633 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 2933 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1149 | 7% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,354,198 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1769 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Whenz | 71% | 62 |
| #2 | Franjoo38 | 66% | 80 |
| #3 | Sandrey | 66% | 70 |
| #4 | Helt | 63% | 38 |
| #5 | Incha'Allah peek Taoufiakqc | 58% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Franjoo38 | 24 | 0.0142 |
| #2 | Setsuna "The "S" Great Artiste" | 20 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | Whenz | 13 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | Incha'Allah peek Taoufiakqc | 13 | 0.0163 |
| #5 | jamalalajambe | 11 | 0.0066 |





