








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1598 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 923 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9556 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 37,776 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18023 | 48% |
| Smokes | 10300 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3898 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 5555 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,429,536 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1632 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | T3SLA model s owner | 53% | 191 |
| #2 | Turbulent Terry | 52% | 61 |
| #3 | solace | 52% | 69 |
| #4 | Evan D | 52% | 92 |
| #5 | Task Manager | 50% | 724 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Turbulent Terry | 52% | 61 |
| #3 | solace | 52% | 69 |
| #4 | Evan D | 52% | 92 |
| #5 | Task Manager | 50% | 724 |
| #6 | 10dp | 50% | 118 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Task Manager | 35 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | 10dp | 15 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | solace | 14 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | T3SLA model s owner | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | Evan D | 2 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Task Manager | 1455 | 0.10 | 38 min |
| #2 | 10dp | 344 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | solace | 317 | 0.22 | 6 min |
| #4 | T3SLA model s owner | 97 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #5 | Evan D | 56 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | solace | +1.74 | 67 | 42 |
| #2 | Evan D | +1.19 | 75 | 34 |
| #3 | T3SLA model s owner | +0.77 | 59 | 32 |
| #4 | spampost | +0.72 | 52 | 65 |
| #5 | Task Manager | -0.55 | 49 | 41 |





