








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 239 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Premier | 16 matches | ||
| Faceit | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
741 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,034 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 752 | 37% |
| Smokes | 542 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 314 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 426 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $407,068 of utility $257 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nepo | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | Banjo | 86% | 7 |
| #3 | Ropu/. | 81% | 37 |
| #4 | syntyny rellestää | 74% | 53 |
| #5 | aFE | 73% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dak | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | syntyny rellestää | 6 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | Ropu/. | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | aFE | 2 | 0.0046 |
| #5 | Banjo | 1 | 0.0072 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dak | 292 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #2 | aFE | 152 | 0.35 | 4 min |
| #3 | Ropu/. | 108 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | syntyny rellestää | 64 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Nepo | 39 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Banjo | +3.21 | 92 | 75 |
| #2 | syntyny rellestää | +2.71 | 81 | 51 |
| #3 | Dak | +2.36 | 84 | 56 |
| #4 | Ropu/. | +2.16 | 93 | 67 |
| #5 | jjequ | +0.58 | 71 | 62 |





