








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 30 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
577 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,431 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 355 | 25% |
| Smokes | 462 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 170 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 444 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $172,019 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mis amigoS | 50% | 12 |
| #2 | ꧅ | 42% | 38 |
| #3 | PDG4 | 42% | 55 |
| #4 | flimp | 39% | 31 |
| #5 | Pancake Engineer | 37% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | PDG4 | 42% | 55 |
| #4 | flimp | 39% | 31 |
| #5 | Pancake Engineer | 37% | 30 |
| #6 | KTNO | 31% | 39 |
| #7 | Zizuzywoo | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KTNO | 11 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | flimp | 5 | 0.0074 |
| #3 | Pancake Engineer | 3 | 0.0048 |
| #4 | ꧅ | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #5 | PDG4 | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PDG4 | 136 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #2 | KTNO | 62 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #3 | flimp | 53 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | Pancake Engineer | 30 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mis amigoS | 18 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mis amigoS | +5.41 | 90 | 39 |
| #2 | Pancake Engineer | +1.32 | 80 | 43 |
| #3 | flimp | +1.03 | 62 | 52 |
| #4 | hojun_sex | +0.63 | 64 | 53 |
| #5 | Zizuzywoo | -1.50 | 80 | 38 |





