








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 382 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 302 matches | ||
| Faceit | 263 matches | ||
| Wingman | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6201 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 28,331 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8873 | 31% |
| Smokes | 7680 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5250 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 6528 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,687,418 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 178 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BerZerK | 56% | 110 |
| #2 | ks | 56% | 539 |
| #3 | TiniRaptor | 54% | 74 |
| #4 | MiniBu | 54% | 389 |
| #5 | svettenesvett | 51% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BerZerK | 56% | 110 |
| #2 | ks | 56% | 539 |
| #3 | TiniRaptor | 54% | 74 |
| #4 | MiniBu | 54% | 389 |
| #5 | svettenesvett | 51% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ks | 13 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | MiniBu | 13 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | BerZerK | 6 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | TiniRaptor | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | svettenesvett | 2 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ks | 1907 | 0.17 | 41 min |
| #2 | BerZerK | 735 | 0.32 | 19 min |
| #3 | MiniBu | 637 | 0.08 | 16 min |
| #4 | svettenesvett | 428 | 0.16 | 11 min |
| #5 | TiniRaptor | 90 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BerZerK | +2.18 | 65 | 75 |
| #2 | ks | +1.30 | 72 | 67 |
| #3 | MiniBu | +0.58 | 84 | 49 |
| #4 | Naka5k | -0.48 | 66 | 65 |
| #5 | svettenesvett | -0.98 | 46 | 65 |





