








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1045 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,740 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 580 | 21% |
| Smokes | 866 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 396 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 898 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $377,144 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soggy bread | 49% | 85 |
| #2 | Until111 | 47% | 49 |
| #3 | sharpaxe | 45% | 101 |
| #4 | FortuneDayZ | 42% | 78 |
| #5 | KaneX0 | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soggy bread | 49% | 85 |
| #2 | Until111 | 47% | 49 |
| #3 | sharpaxe | 45% | 101 |
| #4 | FortuneDayZ | 42% | 78 |
| #5 | KaneX0 | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Until111 | 5 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | sharpaxe | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | soggy bread | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | FortuneDayZ | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sharpaxe | 182 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #2 | FortuneDayZ | 82 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | Until111 | 73 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | soggy bread | 18 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| #5 | KaneX0 | 13 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | soggy bread | +2.21 | 72 | 28 |
| #2 | sharpaxe | +0.62 | 61 | 63 |
| #3 | Egglord | -0.26 | 70 | 50 |
| #4 | FortuneDayZ | -0.57 | 51 | 44 |
| #5 | Until111 | -0.92 | 50 | 45 |





