








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 8 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 79 matches | ||
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1595 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,498 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1112 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1225 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1684 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1477 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $388,655 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | 58% | 12 |
| #6 | GnuuS | 56% | 55 |
| #7 | xiKo | 53% | 15 |
| #8 | Seth | 36% | 11 |
| #9 | Sorryyy | 33% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vexite 2.0 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | GnuuS | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GnuuS | 158 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #2 | Vexite 2.0 | 83 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | MIKU | 59 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Sorryyy | 59 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #5 | xiKo | 57 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MIKU | +3.37 | 83 | 51 |
| #2 | Seth | +2.05 | 82 | 63 |
| #3 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | +1.39 | 75 | 50 |
| #4 | El3ctr0 | +0.74 | 74 | 55 |
| #5 | Vexite 2.0 | +0.34 | 61 | 44 |





