








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 418 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 177 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1386 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,449 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1521 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1597 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1717 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1614 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $595,118 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 210 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sp1cy | 42% | 182 |
| #2 | Ubbegavet | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | Mygind | 38% | 142 |
| #4 | King Dudo | 26% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sp1cy | 42% | 182 |
| #2 | Ubbegavet | 42% | 12 |
| #3 | Mygind | 38% | 142 |
| #4 | King Dudo | 26% | 88 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mygind | 19 | 0.0065 |
| #2 | Sp1cy | 5 | 0.0013 |
| #3 | King Dudo | 5 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mygind | 259 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #2 | Sp1cy | 232 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #3 | King Dudo | 45 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Ubbegavet | 10 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ubbegavet | +4.74 | 91 | 44 |
| #2 | Mygind | +3.44 | 79 | 57 |
| #3 | Sp1cy | +0.29 | 42 | 49 |
| #4 | Boye | -1.71 | 34 | 45 |
| #5 | King Dudo | -5.25 | 10 | 35 |





