








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 44 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 62 matches | ||
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




81 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2933 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,941 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1932 | 19% |
| Smokes | 3890 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1601 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 2518 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,243,862 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1321 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SpudNinja | 42% | 31 |
| #2 | Skeevy Nicks | 35% | 86 |
| #3 | Turbo Fingerz | 34% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SpudNinja | 42% | 31 |
| #2 | Skeevy Nicks | 35% | 86 |
| #3 | Turbo Fingerz | 34% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skeevy Nicks | 6 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Turbo Fingerz | 5 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | SpudNinja | 2 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Skeevy Nicks | 218 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #2 | Turbo Fingerz | 64 | 0.10 | 2 min |
| #3 | SpudNinja | 57 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Turbo Fingerz | +5.64 | 80 | 63 |
| #2 | SpudNinja | +1.93 | 61 | 65 |
| #3 | DOWN ASS FOO | +0.49 | 52 | 45 |
| #4 | Skeevy Nicks | -2.25 | 48 | 57 |





