








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 91 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1284 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,781 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1392 | 29% |
| Smokes | 858 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1382 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1149 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $241,146 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | who? | 41% | 85 |
| #2 | 𝐝𝟏𝐳𝐞𝐲 | 40% | 82 |
| #3 | Clutch | 38% | 65 |
| #4 | Prisma | 37% | 84 |
| #5 | Spectrum | 36% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | 𝐝𝟏𝐳𝐞𝐲 | 40% | 82 |
| #3 | Clutch | 38% | 65 |
| #4 | Prisma | 37% | 84 |
| #5 | Spectrum | 36% | 59 |
| #6 | dizey | 30% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | who? | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Spectrum | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | 𝐝𝟏𝐳𝐞𝐲 | 3 | 0.0017 |
| #4 | Prisma | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | Clutch | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝐝𝟏𝐳𝐞𝐲 | 310 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | who? | 277 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #3 | Clutch | 163 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #4 | Spectrum | 73 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | dizey | 47 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | who? | +2.37 | 81 | 44 |
| #2 | 𝐝𝟏𝐳𝐞𝐲 | +1.00 | 65 | 47 |
| #3 | dizey | +0.90 | 65 | 46 |
| #4 | Spectrum | +0.05 | 62 | 53 |
| #5 | me. | -0.04 | 50 | 66 |





