








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 213 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 347 matches | ||
| Premier | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4220 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,960 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6530 | 41% |
| Smokes | 2978 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4869 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1583 | 10% |
Our logs show you have wasted $741,892 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 637 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | ɣ | 50% | 113 |
| #10 | Yasha | 50% | 228 |
| #11 | JimCheung | 50% | 103 |
| #12 | 只有殘局沒有教學 | 48% | 103 |
| #13 | 1TaPz o.O | 42% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 呀婆走得快 | 16 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | ☃ | 16 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Yasha | 11 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | ɣ | 10 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | 哈草戰士ℱa ⁴ ₂⁰_و | 9 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yasha | 1187 | 0.26 | 25 min |
| #2 | ɣ | 547 | 0.25 | 12 min |
| #3 | 呀婆走得快 | 540 | 0.12 | 12 min |
| #4 | ☃ | 332 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #5 | JimCheung | 262 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 哈草戰士ℱa ⁴ ₂⁰_و | +3.57 | 67 | 62 |
| #2 | ☃ | +3.53 | 75 | 56 |
| #3 | Smoke B | +2.86 | 69 | 61 |
| #4 | JimCheung | +1.24 | 48 | 62 |
| #5 | 呀婆走得快 | +1.08 | 50 | 58 |





