








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 43 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2111 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,518 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1103 | 20% |
| Smokes | 1498 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1714 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 1203 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $565,319 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 20 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kagamiko | 53% | 17 |
| #2 | Cadavria | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | Tazman ( The Angel Guardian ) | 50% | 46 |
| #4 | GUNst4v | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | =PL_razor59= | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kagamiko | 53% | 17 |
| #2 | Cadavria | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | Tazman ( The Angel Guardian ) | 50% | 46 |
| #4 | GUNst4v | 45% | 11 |
| #5 | =PL_razor59= | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kagamiko | 2 | 0.0058 |
| #2 | Tazman ( The Angel Guardian ) | 1 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | =PL_razor59= | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tazman ( The Angel Guardian ) | 62 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | Kagamiko | 48 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #3 | Cadavria | 42 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | GUNst4v | 33 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | =PL_razor59= | 4 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kagamiko | +5.44 | 86 | 67 |
| #2 | Cadavria | +4.76 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | chouchouxx | +2.66 | 77 | 56 |
| #4 | GUNst4v | -3.13 | 69 | 59 |
| #5 | =PL_razor59= | -5.24 | 13 | 9 |





