








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 137 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 98 matches | ||
| Premier | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2830 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,976 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2292 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1836 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1838 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2010 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $663,696 of utility $144 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 216 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ niise | 64% | 28 |
| #2 | grape | 62% | 29 |
| #3 | disconnected | 61% | 46 |
| #4 | Not Pol0 | 57% | 99 |
| #5 | munch | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ niise | 64% | 28 |
| #2 | grape | 62% | 29 |
| #3 | disconnected | 61% | 46 |
| #4 | Not Pol0 | 57% | 99 |
| #5 | munch | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not Pol0 | 12 | 0.0061 |
| #2 | disconnected | 9 | 0.0087 |
| #3 | munch | 3 | 0.0084 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not Pol0 | 456 | 0.23 | 14 min |
| #2 | disconnected | 201 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #3 | ♥ niise | 183 | 0.29 | 5 min |
| #4 | grape | 103 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #5 | munch | 13 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not Pol0 | +3.25 | 91 | 78 |
| #2 | FUGI | +2.55 | 85 | 64 |
| #3 | grape | +1.79 | 80 | 64 |
| #4 | ♥ niise | +0.77 | 80 | 73 |
| #5 | disconnected | +0.61 | 84 | 52 |





