








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 114 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2283 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,876 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1167 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1266 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1148 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1295 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $605,223 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lattzera | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | BBruse | 64% | 66 |
| #3 | Roger that. | 63% | 107 |
| #4 | tangz | 60% | 136 |
| #5 | LittleB | 59% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | BBruse | 64% | 66 |
| #3 | Roger that. | 63% | 107 |
| #4 | tangz | 60% | 136 |
| #5 | LittleB | 59% | 44 |
| #6 | t8te | 59% | 161 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BBruse | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | tangz | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | Roger that. | 3 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | lattzera | 2 | 0.0067 |
| #5 | t8te | 1 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | t8te | 789 | 0.24 | 22 min |
| #2 | tangz | 690 | 0.25 | 19 min |
| #3 | BBruse | 333 | 0.25 | 10 min |
| #4 | Roger that. | 147 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | LittleB | 39 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tangz | +2.21 | 84 | 75 |
| #2 | Frowan | +1.74 | 91 | 57 |
| #3 | BBruse | +1.73 | 86 | 77 |
| #4 | LittleB | +0.10 | 85 | 55 |
| #5 | Roger that. | -0.04 | 72 | 66 |





