








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 488 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 383 matches | ||
| Wingman | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5654 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,322 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2011 | 22% |
| Smokes | 3577 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 1895 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1839 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,668,909 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 78 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pyykkibuii | 52% | 167 |
| #2 | Oikoivupuu | 50% | 335 |
| #3 | :D | 49% | 43 |
| #4 | Mnri | 46% | 178 |
| #5 | lard fat homer | 30% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pyykkibuii | 52% | 167 |
| #2 | Oikoivupuu | 50% | 335 |
| #3 | :D | 49% | 43 |
| #4 | Mnri | 46% | 178 |
| #5 | lard fat homer | 30% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Oikoivupuu | 13 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Mnri | 6 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | Pyykkibuii | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | lard fat homer | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mnri | 669 | 0.20 | 16 min |
| #2 | Oikoivupuu | 339 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #3 | Pyykkibuii | 312 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | lard fat homer | 101 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | :D | 34 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | :D | +4.80 | 72 | 29 |
| #2 | lard fat homer | +3.49 | 90 | 54 |
| #3 | Vrikka | +2.66 | 54 | 46 |
| #4 | Mnri | -0.95 | 56 | 46 |
| #5 | Pyykkibuii | -3.52 | 30 | 49 |





