








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 190 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1177 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,605 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1076 | 30% |
| Smokes | 946 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 712 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 871 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $295,359 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 274 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vster | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | N4jZ | 74% | 19 |
| #3 | spray | 69% | 13 |
| #4 | MisteM | 68% | 59 |
| #5 | scotlandsfinestmale | 61% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | J_ARRE% | 6 | 0.0496 |
| #2 | scotlandsfinestmale | 4 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | MisteM | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | spray | 1 | 0.0032 |
| #5 | lund | 1 | 0.0065 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MisteM | 300 | 0.26 | 8 min |
| #2 | scotlandsfinestmale | 93 | 0.22 | 1 min |
| #3 | spray | 91 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| #4 | N4jZ | 66 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| #5 | Vster | 37 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MisteM | +3.91 | 86 | 66 |
| #2 | N4jZ | +2.12 | 80 | 58 |
| #3 | Vster | +1.76 | 94 | 64 |
| #4 | lund | +1.49 | 92 | 60 |
| #5 | ramziiN | +1.04 | 86 | 64 |





