








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 155 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 130 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1630 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,098 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1714 | 34% |
| Smokes | 1397 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 942 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1045 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $409,708 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 27 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Khabib The Beagle | 59% | 29 |
| #2 | Dranzer DC | 56% | 9 |
| #3 | Baba Yoda | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | SidD | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | 𐂃 | 42% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Baba Yoda | 54% | 24 |
| #4 | SidD | 43% | 51 |
| #5 | 𐂃 | 42% | 19 |
| #6 | kiiiiNNNNNNNNNyyyy | 41% | 29 |
| #7 | Meer Kat | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meer Kat | 2 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kiiiiNNNNNNNNNyyyy | 178 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #2 | SidD | 90 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | 𐂃 | 48 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #4 | Khabib The Beagle | 41 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Dranzer DC | 27 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dranzer DC | +1.76 | 51 | 77 |
| #2 | 𐂃 | +0.90 | 72 | 59 |
| #3 | SidD | +0.23 | 71 | 60 |
| #4 | Pu5hpa | +0.05 | 44 | 53 |
| #5 | kiiiiNNNNNNNNNyyyy | -0.07 | 67 | 79 |





