








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 329 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 169 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2894 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,389 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2634 | 28% |
| Smokes | 2717 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 1890 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2148 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $724,672 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 254 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FaLc0n | 69% | 16 |
| #2 | KingNegative | 61% | 41 |
| #3 | SidD | 60% | 87 |
| #4 | ✪ blue | 58% | 38 |
| #5 | BipashaBiceps | 56% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Khabib The Beagle | 56% | 59 |
| #7 | Baba Yoda | 54% | 24 |
| #8 | GoBliNNN | 53% | 15 |
| #9 | VISI0N | 46% | 26 |
| #10 | Pu5hpa | 42% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SidD | 10 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | BipashaBiceps | 4 | 0.0051 |
| #3 | VISI0N | 3 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | Khabib The Beagle | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | KingNegative | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SidD | 142 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #2 | FaLc0n | 82 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | Khabib The Beagle | 81 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | ✪ blue | 67 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | KingNegative | 66 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KingNegative | +4.72 | 82 | 64 |
| #2 | BipashaBiceps | +3.12 | 87 | 60 |
| #3 | GoBliNNN | +2.61 | 89 | 71 |
| #4 | VISI0N | +1.77 | 74 | 61 |
| #5 | 𐂃 | +1.24 | 71 | 55 |





