








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 241 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1360 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,573 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 650 | 18% |
| Smokes | 235 | 7% |
| HE Grenades | 1464 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 1224 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $435,496 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♡Lucy Muffin♡ | 63% | 64 |
| #2 | Sheesh | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | Maybe I Have yes | 53% | 55 |
| #4 | [Thyson] | MGSΔ hype | 50% | 175 |
| #5 | Dreamshade | 47% | 100 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Dreamshade | 47% | 100 |
| #6 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | 47% | 133 |
| #7 | Brookytron | 42% | 83 |
| #8 | [Siggi smalls ] | 41% | 17 |
| #9 | ꧁♥ Sunny ♥꧂ | 33% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dreamshade | 17 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | [Thyson] | MGSΔ hype | 9 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | Brookytron | 9 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | 5 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Maybe I Have yes | 3 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Thyson] | MGSΔ hype | 619 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #2 | Dreamshade | 281 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | ♡Lucy Muffin♡ | 244 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #4 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | 240 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| #5 | Maybe I Have yes | 104 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fearLess™ | Finally! CS2! | +3.74 | 79 | 52 |
| #2 | Dreamshade | +2.84 | 81 | 59 |
| #3 | ♡Lucy Muffin♡ | +1.93 | 57 | 77 |
| #4 | [Thyson] | MGSΔ hype | +1.26 | 51 | 72 |
| #5 | Maybe I Have yes | +1.08 | 71 | 58 |





